"You should have known better!" The writing was on the walls." "How could you NOT see."
You know all of sayings that 'they' say when you are, let's just say "blinded by love".
Why do we as women choose to ignore one of our most powerful powers? The power of intuition. In my opinion, it's societies fault! We've been taught to excuse, justify, and/or minimize a mans bad behavior. Just think back to the saying, "Oh, he's just being a boy." Can you really blame women for failing to "see" a man's red flags? But HOLD ON! Let's not only blame society, some men have no problem adding gas to the manipulation flame. When you're going through that fire of manipulation your entire environment can become red so it seems normal.
Well Sis I'm here to tell IT IS NOT!!
As you began to build more conscious relationships and integrate mindfulness into dating here are my top 3 red flags to make sure you look out for.
- That feeling that "This is not right"
When your gut talks; the solution is simple. LISTEN! I know. I know! and probably too well that when you have feelings for that person you'll want to give them the benefit of a doubt. However, when we do just that the blame tends to turn around and it becomes we 'were just too trusting' or some other BS. Learn to trust your power.
- You sacrifice a LOT for them
Yes! There is a certain level of compromise that every healthy relationship should experience, but no one person should be sacrificing everything. Be cognizant on what you are giving up because of love. If you are giving up too much and they are not giving up anything, RUN SIS. You are in what is a called a Toxic relationship.
- The relationship is a piece of Crap
And you know it but you choose to stay because of the love(or in my case the children). Being so stuck on the fact that you love each other can be detrimental to you and if you have them children as well. Sometimes love means letting go. Never allow love alone to keep you in a relationship that isn't working. One of the most helpful and important things said to me when I was thinking of leaving my toxic relationship was "Whatever is good for you is good for your children".
*Bonus*
Be sure to read my previous blog "Sex Ed on a Whole New Level" to learn how you already have the power within.